We all want to feel special. For our ability/effort/talent to be recognised and rewarded. But if everyone is special, then being special doesn't feel so special anymore. You have to have an in-group and an out-group.
You make skaters feel special by including them in special lessons, inviting them to take part in competitions, inviting them to parties, taking them on trips, giving them special rules like no hoodies. The important point to remember is that you have to make sure you exclude enough people that being in the in-group makes skaters feel special, but big enough to withstand natural wastage (skaters quitting the sport), sabotage (skaters going to other coaches outside of the in-group coaches), or group members not having the time and/or money to participate in all group events.
The in-group is only a bad thing if it hurts people. So, if kids who aren't in the group are made to feel bad deliberately, or if the power trip stops the skaters looking where they're going on ice (filled with a confidence that they're invincible and/or they have more right to be there than anyone else, so everyone had better move or else) and someone gets injured,blatant bullying (of skaters, parents or coaches), turning previously pleasant children into brats, or creating a bad atmosphere between skaters and or parents.
Hi, I just wanted to say that as another relatively new adult skater (you've been at it longer than me (just 4 months, I'm 20)) I love your blog :) I have group lessons still (only on skate uk 9) and sometimes have a hard time being confidant when I'm surrounded by a gaggle of kids half my height. My experience with skate-mums aren't nearly as good as yours. I'm at uni 200 miles away from home so my parents have no involvement in my skating whatsoever. I find most skate-mums tend to think I'm taking up valuable time from the coach that could otherwise be directed at their little angels. Never the less I'm determined to persevere and with help and advice from other adult skaters I'm hoping to pull through. My next big challenge: navigate the mine-field that is new skates. I'm skating in six year old riedell 112's that just aren't cutting it for me (and I now suspect are half a size too big!) but its taking forever to find new ones, there's just so many so any help or advice you have would be great. x
ReplyDeleteHi :-)
ReplyDeleteWell done for your progress so far! SkateUK level 9 in just four months is fantastic!
Ignore those Skatemums, you've paid for your lessons, you have just as much right to the coach's time as they do! I only started to get to know the skatemums when I started doing patch regularly.
Re skates: there's no hard and fast rules, as everyone's feet are different. Try on as many makes as you can, and don't be afraid to ask lots of questions. Consider what you wanna do after skate uk, but don't get boots that are too stiff, cause then you won't be able to get enough knee and ankle bend. Treat anyone who says "get Brand X Model Y skates" with extreme caution, unless it's after a long discussion with an expert.
good luck with the new skates and your skating!