We all want to feel special. For our ability/effort/talent to be recognised and rewarded. But if everyone is special, then being special doesn't feel so special anymore. You have to have an in-group and an out-group.
You make skaters feel special by including them in special lessons, inviting them to take part in competitions, inviting them to parties, taking them on trips, giving them special rules like no hoodies. The important point to remember is that you have to make sure you exclude enough people that being in the in-group makes skaters feel special, but big enough to withstand natural wastage (skaters quitting the sport), sabotage (skaters going to other coaches outside of the in-group coaches), or group members not having the time and/or money to participate in all group events.
The in-group is only a bad thing if it hurts people. So, if kids who aren't in the group are made to feel bad deliberately, or if the power trip stops the skaters looking where they're going on ice (filled with a confidence that they're invincible and/or they have more right to be there than anyone else, so everyone had better move or else) and someone gets injured,blatant bullying (of skaters, parents or coaches), turning previously pleasant children into brats, or creating a bad atmosphere between skaters and or parents.
Friday 29 April 2011
Tuesday 19 April 2011
There will be beginners on public sessions, deal with it!
Reccently I've heard some comments from figure skaters to the effect that if someone gets in their way on a public session, they'll intimidate that person by doing a camel spin or jump or something practically on top of the offender to "scare them off". The same skaters will then complain about so-called hockey skaters (not actual hockey players) dashing about. All this is on a public session.
Public session. Means open to everyone. If you want to practice with a stick and puck, there are plenty of hockey training times. Equally, if you want to seriously practice free skating or ice dance, there is plenty of patch ice. By all means skate on public sessions, but don't expect to be able to train seriously!
I have been on quiet public sessions with some of my friends doing double jumps, flying spins, fast field moves etc. As more people came on, they stopped jumping and were more careful with spins and stuff. When it got busier, we left to go have food. On a busy Saturday morning you're lucky if you can even practice crossovers or one foot glides, and trying anything backwards is suicide.
These people "getting in your way" probably don't mean to. On patch, people can tell when you're setting up a jump or spin, or if you're doing a compulsory dance or field moves. On public, they're too busy trying not to fall down to pay attention to you. And those teenagers zooming around and chasing each other have just as much right to be there as you. So do the little kids who can't skate three steps without falling on their bottoms.
Nobody has a right to do anything to threaten or endanger anyone else. Whether it's crashing into people deliberately, or doing a camel spin right next to someone, it's stupid and childish and worst of all, dangerous and I lose all respect for anyone doing it. In fact, I lose more respect for serious skaters than kids just messing around. If you skate enough to be able to do a camel spin or jumps or whatever, you skate enough to know better.
The people who I've heard making these comments are adult skaters. The child skaters I know are sensible to use public sessions to play with their friends and patch ice to actually train. Grow up, before someone gets seriously hurt!
Public session. Means open to everyone. If you want to practice with a stick and puck, there are plenty of hockey training times. Equally, if you want to seriously practice free skating or ice dance, there is plenty of patch ice. By all means skate on public sessions, but don't expect to be able to train seriously!
I have been on quiet public sessions with some of my friends doing double jumps, flying spins, fast field moves etc. As more people came on, they stopped jumping and were more careful with spins and stuff. When it got busier, we left to go have food. On a busy Saturday morning you're lucky if you can even practice crossovers or one foot glides, and trying anything backwards is suicide.
These people "getting in your way" probably don't mean to. On patch, people can tell when you're setting up a jump or spin, or if you're doing a compulsory dance or field moves. On public, they're too busy trying not to fall down to pay attention to you. And those teenagers zooming around and chasing each other have just as much right to be there as you. So do the little kids who can't skate three steps without falling on their bottoms.
Nobody has a right to do anything to threaten or endanger anyone else. Whether it's crashing into people deliberately, or doing a camel spin right next to someone, it's stupid and childish and worst of all, dangerous and I lose all respect for anyone doing it. In fact, I lose more respect for serious skaters than kids just messing around. If you skate enough to be able to do a camel spin or jumps or whatever, you skate enough to know better.
The people who I've heard making these comments are adult skaters. The child skaters I know are sensible to use public sessions to play with their friends and patch ice to actually train. Grow up, before someone gets seriously hurt!
Saturday 16 April 2011
Switching coaches
I am NOT switching coaches. Promise.
But at my rink a whole lot of people are having to at the moment because one of the full time coaches is leaving. Another coach also just left, although she had fewer skaters than the first one.
Personally, I've only changed coaches once. And it wasn't by choice, it was after my first coach left the rink suddenly. But I've seen it happen, and have thoughts.
Be open.
Ok, sometimes it's not possible. Sometimes you want to have a new coach lined up before you let the old one go. But don't start lessons or take trips with new coach before telling old coach, especially if you want to continue taking lessons with them or at least stay on good terms. New coach shouldn't let you do this, if they do you may want to question their ethics.
Don't gossip.
People are gonna know you've changed coaches (or dropped a coach or started lessons with a new coach) and will probably ask about it. Only ever say nice things. If you have nothing nice to say about Old Coach, focus on the positives of New Coach, not the negatives of Old Coach.
Make it easy for the skater.
You might hate old coach with a fiery passion. But your skater might love them and have respect for them, so don't bitch about old coach in the hearing of the child (or just don't bitch at all). Make sure they like and respect new coach and that they're comfortable with the change. In a situation like mine, where one coach is leaving, the skater is probably sad about leaving their old coach, but they should still be excited and open to lessons with new coach.
Don't sink to their level.
Some coaches are bitches. Just like some teachers/nurses/office workers/firemen/police people etc are bitches. If old coach takes things out you or you kid, all you can do is ignore it and focus on the skating. Keep your head up, grit your teeth and wear earplugs. Like any bully, if they see it upsets you it'll get worse, if you ignore it they'll eventually get bored.
Final note.
My favourite comment from a coach switching parent was that she didn't care if new coach was really a better coach (although she thought that new coach was better), she would rather her child grew up to be like new coach than grew up to be like old coach. Your kid probably isn't going to the Olympics. But any coach is gonna be a huge influence on a child's life. Pick one you wouldn't mind your kid turning into.
But at my rink a whole lot of people are having to at the moment because one of the full time coaches is leaving. Another coach also just left, although she had fewer skaters than the first one.
Personally, I've only changed coaches once. And it wasn't by choice, it was after my first coach left the rink suddenly. But I've seen it happen, and have thoughts.
Be open.
Ok, sometimes it's not possible. Sometimes you want to have a new coach lined up before you let the old one go. But don't start lessons or take trips with new coach before telling old coach, especially if you want to continue taking lessons with them or at least stay on good terms. New coach shouldn't let you do this, if they do you may want to question their ethics.
Don't gossip.
People are gonna know you've changed coaches (or dropped a coach or started lessons with a new coach) and will probably ask about it. Only ever say nice things. If you have nothing nice to say about Old Coach, focus on the positives of New Coach, not the negatives of Old Coach.
Make it easy for the skater.
You might hate old coach with a fiery passion. But your skater might love them and have respect for them, so don't bitch about old coach in the hearing of the child (or just don't bitch at all). Make sure they like and respect new coach and that they're comfortable with the change. In a situation like mine, where one coach is leaving, the skater is probably sad about leaving their old coach, but they should still be excited and open to lessons with new coach.
Don't sink to their level.
Some coaches are bitches. Just like some teachers/nurses/office workers/firemen/police people etc are bitches. If old coach takes things out you or you kid, all you can do is ignore it and focus on the skating. Keep your head up, grit your teeth and wear earplugs. Like any bully, if they see it upsets you it'll get worse, if you ignore it they'll eventually get bored.
Final note.
My favourite comment from a coach switching parent was that she didn't care if new coach was really a better coach (although she thought that new coach was better), she would rather her child grew up to be like new coach than grew up to be like old coach. Your kid probably isn't going to the Olympics. But any coach is gonna be a huge influence on a child's life. Pick one you wouldn't mind your kid turning into.
Thursday 7 April 2011
Off Ice
My coach runs an off ice class for some of her skaters, in a dance studio away from the rink. There's a core group of five of us, and I'm by far the oldest, fattest and worst skater! But the kids are lovely, and hilarious! We generally work on fitness, flexibility, core strength, jumps and presentation. Some weeks we focus on one element more than the others, like this week it was jumps, last week a ballerina came in and we did mainly presentation. But we usually do at least a bit of everything.
Fitness
We start every week by some running round, and since the first week I no longer feel like I'm going to die at the end of it! Skating and off ice are my only real exercise, so another hour a week of exercise is always going to be a good thing!
Flexibility
We do some general stretches and spiral stretches. Coach helps us to do progressive stretches to make them more effective. Some of the kids are ridiculously flexible, but not even them are as bendy as the ballerina, who could calmly sit in side splits and lean her stomach on the floor!
Core Strength
Sit ups and push ups have become a feature at the beginning. One of the kids finds these absolutely hysterical, and when Coach made her do them on the ice, she was giggling away! Another one where we lay on our backs or our stomachs and raise our legs and shoulders off the ground slightly. It's really hard on your back, easier on your stomach. And this week I beat the kids, we had to hold it for thirty seconds and I was the only one who did it! Coach made the kids do it again, mwahahaha! The kids also do cartwheels, handstands and headstands sometimes, but I give these a miss. As an extremely overweight adult, I don't think throwing my whole weight onto my hands is a good thing, and may well end in a broken wrist or two!
Jumps
One of the kids is working on her axel. She can land it off ice when she puts the effort in, but hasn't done it on the ice yet. I think knowing she can do it off ice is a confidence booster, or it would be for me anyway! Some of the others have attempted double axels off the ice, while still only working on low doubles on the ice. It's a good chance to work on height, landing positions, rotation, not wrapping your legs in the air, and committing to the jump, without actually doing it. You can still fall off ice, but it doesn't seem as scary some how. Maybe cause you don't have that pesky, slippery ice! Sometimes off ice jumps are harder because you don't have the momentum or speed of the ice to help you. Also, make sure you wear deccent shoes! I hurt my ankle one week doing too many jumps in rubbish shoes (nothing major, and it was fine after a week, but why risk it?)
Presentation
I mentioned the ballerina who came in, she helped us with some graceful arm movements (well they were graceful when she did them anyway, not sure I quite pulled it off!). Coach also had us work on our programs off ice so we could focus on presenting them nicely, without having to worry too much about the actual elements.
Fitness
We start every week by some running round, and since the first week I no longer feel like I'm going to die at the end of it! Skating and off ice are my only real exercise, so another hour a week of exercise is always going to be a good thing!
Flexibility
We do some general stretches and spiral stretches. Coach helps us to do progressive stretches to make them more effective. Some of the kids are ridiculously flexible, but not even them are as bendy as the ballerina, who could calmly sit in side splits and lean her stomach on the floor!
Core Strength
Sit ups and push ups have become a feature at the beginning. One of the kids finds these absolutely hysterical, and when Coach made her do them on the ice, she was giggling away! Another one where we lay on our backs or our stomachs and raise our legs and shoulders off the ground slightly. It's really hard on your back, easier on your stomach. And this week I beat the kids, we had to hold it for thirty seconds and I was the only one who did it! Coach made the kids do it again, mwahahaha! The kids also do cartwheels, handstands and headstands sometimes, but I give these a miss. As an extremely overweight adult, I don't think throwing my whole weight onto my hands is a good thing, and may well end in a broken wrist or two!
Jumps
One of the kids is working on her axel. She can land it off ice when she puts the effort in, but hasn't done it on the ice yet. I think knowing she can do it off ice is a confidence booster, or it would be for me anyway! Some of the others have attempted double axels off the ice, while still only working on low doubles on the ice. It's a good chance to work on height, landing positions, rotation, not wrapping your legs in the air, and committing to the jump, without actually doing it. You can still fall off ice, but it doesn't seem as scary some how. Maybe cause you don't have that pesky, slippery ice! Sometimes off ice jumps are harder because you don't have the momentum or speed of the ice to help you. Also, make sure you wear deccent shoes! I hurt my ankle one week doing too many jumps in rubbish shoes (nothing major, and it was fine after a week, but why risk it?)
Presentation
I mentioned the ballerina who came in, she helped us with some graceful arm movements (well they were graceful when she did them anyway, not sure I quite pulled it off!). Coach also had us work on our programs off ice so we could focus on presenting them nicely, without having to worry too much about the actual elements.
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